Friday, January 29, 2016

Why Teach?


Being interested in literature for a great majority of my life, I’ve often connected with the wisdom of great writers from the past.   One of the first literary novels I can remember reading is Oliver Twist, by Charles Dickens.  In this book he wrote that “The sun,--the bright sun, that brings back, not light alone, but new life, and hope, and freshness to man--burst upon the crowded city in clear and radiant glory. Through costly-coloured glass and paper-mended window, through cathedral dome and rotten crevice, it shed its equal ray.”  From early on in life, by reading and identifying with statements such as this, I learned that money has no real, intrinsic value and that there is much more to life.  I wasn’t sure exactly what I wanted to do with my life, but I was sure that I wasn’t going to chase dollars but rather hold value in relationships, doing solid work, and helping others.  It was these early principles that guided me down the long, winding path to become an educator. 

The first few years in teaching are more stressful, cumbersome, and fatiguing than anyone can imagine.  There is no magic formula, no advice, and no college curriculum than can serve to prepare teachers for what they are about to encounter.  At any given moment in the classroom teachers are met with apathy, hostility, despair, confusion, absurdity, and any other number of things.  The only way through is by doing.  Experience is the only path to liberation and inspiration is hard to find.   Some anecdotal evidence of such difficulties facing teachers comes from a recent interaction I had with an old friend at a holiday event.  Before becoming a teacher this year, he served as a soldier in Afghanistan and was also a ten-year veteran of the police force.  When I asked how his first year of teaching was going, he said, “Of all the things I’ve ever hated, I’ve never hated anything as much as I hate teaching.” 

Now, with over a decade of classroom experience behind me, I have found the best way to succeed in the classroom is to be genuine.  When the students see this, they perform.  When students know that you are a real person who passionately brings enthusiasm and concern to the classroom day after day, in spite of an endless barrage of disconnected and aimless reforms and mandates, they sincerely attempt to succeed.  And it is in these attempts where inspiration lies. 

Without that inspiration, I would’ve left the profession years ago, mirroring the feelings of my first year teacher friend.  It’s not the pay.  It’s not the respect.   And it’s not the opportunity for advancement that inspires teachers to grind it out in the classroom day after day.  It’s the successes of the kids we work with that inspires and drives us.

More concretely, I’m inspired by Ashley, a current senior who I taught in 11th grade who came up to me in the hallway several weeks ago smiling and jumping up and down with joy.  “Mr. Fagan.  Do you remember how bad I did on that pre-test you gave for ACT skills last year?  Well, with all of the practice and review and work you gave us last year, I just got my results back and my composite score was a 30!  Thank you so much for all that you did to help me!”  That inspires me.

I’m inspired by the students who arrive in my speech class terrified of talking in front of a group of people.  I’ve had students cry during their first speech.  I had a student run out of the classroom and hide because she was so scared.  And every year there are others who want to make immediate guidance appointments to get their schedules changed while I reassure them that it won’t always be this hard and that at some point, they are going to have to face it.  And there isn’t a feeling that compares to seeing these same students grow, build poise, and confidence as the course develops.  By the end of the year, many of these students not only give 7-9 minute speeches, but they learn how to confidently command a room. 

I’m inspired when students in my first period make it to class 70 out of the first 90 days of school.  I’m inspired because in spite of the obstacles thrown in their way they arrive as often as they can.  They arrive when they can and work hard to succeed even when they are the sole morning care-takers of elementary aged siblings that have no other means to get to school because their mothers are working. 

I’m inspired when my honors students challenge themselves and take Advanced Placement courses in 12th grade. 

I’m inspired when my students get accepted into the colleges of their choice.

I’m inspired on graduation night when I arrive for my assigned duty and see my students in their caps and gowns.  They run over to me.  They hug me.  They take pictures with me.  They let me know how much what we did together means to them.  And that means everything to me. 

I’m inspired when former students reach out to let me know that they are doing great things now. 

I’m inspired when I get a call from a former student now serving in Afghanistan while home on leave, asking to make plans to meet up before the holidays. 

I’m inspired when former students become teachers and say that they’ve chosen that path because of the influence I’ve had on them (and I’m also terrified by their career choices as I see what the future of our profession holds in store for them). 

I’m inspired when I’m invited to the weddings of former students. 

I’m inspired when I receive baby pictures of their children.

I’m inspired when I receive Christmas cards in the mail from them. 

I’m inspired by my colleagues who come into work on a daily basis and do the work that matters in the face of adversity, animosity, disrespect, and an ever-changing environment because they too, know what it’s all about. 

In a profession when teacher voices are so often devalued and unheeded, there is so often very little to uplift and inspire.  The pay surely doesn’t inspire.  The rising costs of benefits, deductibles, and copays doesn’t inspire.   The lack of respect and autonomy doesn’t inspire.  The intentional debilitation of public schools and the invaluable services they provide does not inspire.
 If it weren’t for the kids and the daily interactions, laughs, tears, learning experiences, and small victories we experience together, there’d be no reason to teach at all. 

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